Estate Sales and Bonding

One of the ways I bond with my dad is by going together to a certain estate sale place in Wilmington (see previous blog post) and/or discussing strategies for casing certain estate sale place. Usually this also involves the subject of cooking.

Dad: When you get there, go straight to the cookbook section and look for books from Jacques Pepin (and some other French chef I don't remember).

Dad (in knives section): This is the greatest knife you'll ever want.
Me: It says it's "The Wonder Knife".
Dad: Yeah, I buy these up everytime i see them. I have one in the truck in case i see a dead animal on the road. When I do, I'll cut off it's tail and hang it the truck.
Me: hmph. (looking around to see who is listening to us)
Dad: If you don't buy it I will. Oh look, there's two here.
Me: I'll buy one.

Don't See...

American Dreamz. It has to be the worst movie of the year. If you want to know why, I will now give you parts of the uninteresting and somewhat offensive sub-plot:

In this take-off of American Idol,

1. The President of the United States sounds like George Bush and is a bumbling idot.
2. The President's wife tries to convince him to take his 'happy pills'.
3. A Dick Cheney look-a-like tells the president what to say through an ear piece.
4. Mandy Moore's character tricks her ex-boyfriend, now a war vetran, into believing she still loves him to get more ratings.
5. She then sleeps with the Simon Cowell character in her dressing room before the final performance.
6. She is caught by her boyfriend who then tries to blow himself up on national tv, and succeeds, killing himself and the Simon Cowell character.
7. This frees up a space for Mandy Moore's character to host the show in the next season. (a happy ending?)

Is it just me? No. I went to this movie with my friend and his Bela-Russia wife. As we left the theater she said, I think this is not good movie. If I were American, I would be upset and embarrassed.

To Karin

Dear Karin,
Got your message. I changed your title to something more appropriate. I hope you'll be happy now. :)

Home

My parents live near Kennett Square, PA also known as
'The Mushroom Capital of the World'. While this is a mildly interesting fact, it might further interest you to know that mushrooms grow in giant, steaming piles of doo-doo.

Not to be outdone, my parents formerly lived in the city of Wilmington, Delaware. I passed a sign today with Wilmington's motto. It said, 'Wilmington: A place to be somebody.' Nobody specific, just somebody in some city in some state. Delaware, the second smallest state after Rhode Island, calls itself the Diamond State. For years I thought we had diamonds here like South Africa. Later I learned that we call ourselves that because we're 'small, but precious'. We have another equally quirky nickname: Delaware: The Small Wonder. I do like our new motto though: 'Delaware: It's Good Being First.'

Girls are Better

I think girls are attractive when they instinctively do something or say something that seems like they've known this information their whole life. Meanwhile I'm heading to the computer to google it. It see it alot. I see it with babies and kids and it's really interesting.

It really interests me when it's in the guy/girl relationship area. Sometimes something happens in a relationship that seems very straightforward to me. But then, the response seems completely strange and I'm thinking 'What just happened?' Then I ask a girl and it takes her about a nano-second to process what happened. Then she tries to explain it to me.

Can't Put My Finger On It

I've been having trouble with a friend of mine, so I talked it over with someone who knows about these things. It's not the usual kind of trouble that one normally deals with in relationship. This person said something that surprised me -- he said he thought there was a personality disorder going on here. I kinda knew what that was but not really, so I looked it up. It's probably not a good idea to be diagnosing people around us, but this description fit the situation pretty well.

A person with a borderline personality disorder often experiences a repetitive pattern of instability in self-image, mood, behavior and close personal relationships. This can cause significant distress or impairment in friendships and work. A person with this disorder can often be bright and intelligent, and appear warm, friendly and competent. They sometimes can maintain this appearance for a number of years until their defense structure crumbles, usually around a stressful situation like the breakup of a romantic relationship or the death of a parent.

Law

In pre-Islamic Turkey, if a wife let the family coffee pot run dry, her husband was free to divorce her.

The opposite was true in Saudi Arabia, where a woman was free to divorce her husband if he didn't keep her supplied with coffee.

If you curse within earshot of a woman in Egypt, the law says you forfeit two days pay.

In Rio de Janeiro, it's illegal to dance the samba in a tunnel.

If you're arrested for drunk driving in Malaysia, you and your wife goes to jail.

Red cars are outlawed in Shanghai, China.

-source: Uncle John' s Legendary Lost Bathroom Reader

Danger

Awkward

When you visit the church that supports you, people who don't know what to say to you sometimes look at you and say, 'I'm happy'.

Sometimes the idea of going to an Easter sunrise service at 7:00 am outside seems like a good idea until you get there and the guy who hosts it opens it up for anyone to say something, then gives the customary 'Don't everyone speak at once.' comment, then allows a few agonizing minutes of numbing silence, and then some guy offers, 'I have a praise. I finished my taxes.'

Sometimes when you ask to meet your supporter for coffee and she is older and single and very conservative, she might answer your question with a long 'yeeeaaahhhh...ummm...yeeeeaaahhh', and then you should give her an out so she doesn't think you're asking her out for a date.

When you see people you haven't seen in a long time, they usually remember embarassing details of your life from like 10 years ago and will feel comfortable bringing them up in group situations.

When you are sharing a holiday meal with a family that is not your own, sometimes they will stare at you often during the meal and study you're facial expressions and then ask you to 'smile' or 'are you ok' or 'do need a drink...soda, WINE.'

Warning

Word of the Day

crapulous \KRAP-yuh-lus\, adjective:
1. Suffering the effects of, or derived from, or suggestive of gross intemperance, especially in drinking; as, a crapulous stomach.

Crapulous is from the Late Latin crapulosus, from Latin crapula, from Greek kraipale, drunkeness and its consequences, nausea, sickness, and headace.

My Philly Friends

I'm in Pennsylvania now and whenever I come up here I need to see a few friends.

I need to see Pat.

I need to see Primo.

And I need to see Joe.

Tip

More About ME

This website gives the basics of sailing, a hobby of mine.

This website has great deals.

This website gives legal advice.

These guys are designing a video cover for us.

This site give daily delay reports at Orlando International.

This site lets you hear from a real ninja.

This is a furniture designer I like.

This is the headlamp I just bought.

This is a cool tea site.

MAC people....Issues!

Conversation

Male friend to my left: Say goodbye to John, he's leaving us tomorrow to go support raising.

Two girls to my right: Oooohh (pained grimace, in unison)

Me: (laughing) Mmmhmm...you're excited by that?

Girl to my right: Where are you going?

Me: To Pennsylvania

Girl to my right: Why Pennsylvania?

Me: Because my parents live there.

Girl to my right: So you're going to see your family?

Me: What?

Girl: I'm confused.

What Country?

Apology

Dear Karin:

I apologize for stealing your links.

I thought it would help that I named your link, the theologian. And that copying pure genius is the highest compliment.

Thank you for confessing to stealing my email signature four years ago. I forgive you.

-john

PS - I also stole your post font: Verdana small. Sorry.

Story

This actually happened to me.

At the beginning of the week, a friend invited me and another friend over for dinner for that Saturday. About mid-week, I received a call to make sure all was well and that I would, in fact, be coming (yes). The day of, at about noon, I received a call asking if I had any chicken (yes), and would I bring it (yes). A few hours later, I received a call asking if I had rice (yes) and garlic (yes) and would I bring it (yes) (yes). Oh, and would I mind picking up some Cayenne Pepper at the store on the way over (hpf, yeeess). When I arrived at invitees home with said goods, I was asked if I would help out in food preparation (uhh, yes). About mid preparation, I was asked if I would cook the food, since I'm 'such a good chef' (silence ...yes).

Oh, and I didn't mention that the other friend came late and received no such calls. lol

So, my question to you is: what's the moral of the story here (be kind)?

PS: Lest you think I'm holding a grudge, my friend and I talked and all is well now.

This Won't Ever Happen Again

On Wednesday of this week, at two minutes and three seconds after 1:00 in the morning, the time and date will be:
01:02:03 04/05/06.

Does TiVo think I'm 10?

TiVo has a feature that records programs it thinks you'll like based on your previous recordings. So why does TiVo think I like a) The PowerRangers, b)The Magic Bus, or c) Xena, The Warrior Princess?

Ok, I didn't mind the Xena pick so much... it does have 'Warrior' in the title...hmmm, but it also has 'Princess'.

I'm watching you, TiVo (literally).

Maximizers

Sometimes when I meet with my boss, he likes to 'check-in' on how I'm doing in other areas of my life - i.e. non-work areas. He tells me how he's doing too, like how many times he worked out last week. Ok, maybe I didn't need to know that, but it is pretty cool that he has goals and he's working toward meeting them. I have trouble making plans for the weekend, so clearly this couldn't hurt.

A friend asked me recently for the guidlines my boss uses (which he pillaged from Ron Jensens's Maximizers), and it seemed like a great idea to pass on to you as well.

Start by making three reasonable goals in each of these areas.

Faith, Family, Fitness, Fun, Firm(your job), Finances, Friends

Review them weekly or bi-weekly with someone to see how you're doing. Adjust them bi-annually. Don't skip the step of bringing someone into your goals. It's part of taking a risk and being a dude.

Saturday

Saturday, I volunteered to work in the Kids Area of the Luis Palau Orlando Festival. I picked the inflatable castle - giant and tall - mostly because it had the best shade and Saturday was hot. It was a good day...and then there was the ocassional kid or two that would not leave...lol "Time's up buddy, let's go," I'd say. They'd bounce up and down as if they didn't hear me. It's pretty funny watching parents trying to lure their kid out of a bounce house. I watched them use all their tricks...."Bye, we're leaving", they'd say. Some bouncing kids seemed to say "Fine, go." Another parent would speak in staccato, "Em.i.ly Grace...you come here...NOW." No movement from the kid...just watching helpless mom or dad talk to them through the small opening. I must say, it was one of the more enjoyable things to watch that day.